It's only been a little over a week since I last blogged, but it feels like it's been weeks. SO much has happened... I can't even begin to wrap my mind around it all. There's been good, there's been bad, and there's been the devastating.... but somewhere in the midst of it all, I think I found hope.
I won't even begin to get into the devastating here. If you know, then you're supposed to know. If not, then maybe I'll talk about it some day. Let's just say that I fought for something that I truly believed in with all my heart, only to be met with brick wall after brick wall. It sucks, but there's nothing more I can do. I'm moving on. I won't let it bother me again.
As for the bad... well, some of the bad led to the good. It's funny how often that happens, particularly for me. I try so hard to be the optimistic little girl with rainbows and unicorns on the horizon, but sometimes, obstacles get thrown in the way of those happy things. I have to fight (sometimes with myself) to get through the tough times, but I usually find even more rainbows, sparkly unicorns, and bright sunshines on the other side.
OK, cheesy metaphor aside... I reallyreallyreally wanted to study abroad/do my internship in the UK... see here . Turns out that it's super difficult to find a program in the UK that is reasonably priced and SBC Education Program appropriate. But once I finally got over that disappointment, I began to see the benefits of a different program. Longwood University does an education practicum program over the summer at an English-speaking school in Valencia, Spain. For a very reasonable price, you get airfare from DC to Spain, all meals with a Spanish host family, transportation in Spain, weekend excursions, and student insurance. Basically, you only need money for spending and emergencies. How crazy is that? It's a month long program (give or take a few days), and it was less than half the price of a two-week program in the UK. It's a great opportunity, and I'm excited to start pursuing. So hopefully, I'll be spending mid-May through mid-June of 2011 in Spain! EEEEEEKKKK!! And I thought going to California was an adventure :)
Some other stuff has happened in the past eight days, but I really don't feel like blogging about it. I'm trying to focus on the happy things... like Briar Bowl tomorrow night (YAY for the wealth of useless knowledge in my head couple with my insane competitive side, courtesy of SHS Academic Team. Ah, I miss it).... or the absolutely stunning new Taylor Swift album, Speak Now. Gah. It's incredible... I love her songwriting style. Every lyric just drips with reality and emotion and feeling, and I can feel everything she feels through the sound of her voice. I can't even pick a favorite song. They're all amazing. A few stand out to me though...
The first verse of "Never Grow Up" makes me cry because I miss my little Kaylee Sue so very much, and it's my every wish for her embodied in a few sentences. "To you, everything's funny; you've got nothing to regret. I'd give all I have, honey, if you could stay like that. Oh darling, don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up; it can stay this simple. I won't let nobody hurt you; won't let no one break your heart. No one will desert you, just try to never grow up."
I also love "Enchanted" because it's beautiful, and I know exactly how that feels (plus, she supposedly wrote it about Adam Young. Yup. Owl City himself. How crazy is that!?!?!). "This night is sparkling; don't you let it go. I'm wonderstruck, crushing all the way home. I spent forever wondering if you knew I was enchanted to meet you."
I adored "Last Kiss" from the moment I heard it because it echoes a pivotal moment in my life, too... imagine how I felt when I figured out it was about Joe (!!!!!). "All that I know is that I don't know how to be something you miss."
"Better Than Revenge" is incredible in so many ways... what a slap in the face to Camilla Belle!! "She's an actress, but she's better known for the things she does on the mattress!"
"Long Live" is a beautiful ode to her band, but I feel like it embodies everything I've experienced with my besties. I cry listening to it sometimes.... the lines "I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you" and "The cynics were outraged, screaming 'This is absurd!' 'cause for a moment a band of thieves in ripped up jeans got to rule the world. Long live the walls we crashed through, the kingdom lights shine just for me and you. I was screaming, long live all the magic we made, and bring on all the pretenders- I'm not afraid." This song pretty much made my life after the week I had last week <3
"Ours" is a bonus track, but it's totally worth mentioning. I adore this song. There are rumors she wrote it about Cory Monteith (if she did, OMG, lucky girl. Even if she didn't, it's still cute). Favorite line: "So don't you worry your pretty little mind; people throw rocks at things that shine... the stakes are high, the water's rough, but this love is ours." <3
So that's that... I love how most of this blog is an epic rambling about Speak Now :) But tonight is Rocky Horror Glee Show, and there are preparations to be made... so here's to finding hope in the darkest situations. I only hope that the hope I found can get me through this week...
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